I hate these pictures and think they make me look doofy but I think a visual is helpful and informative so I’m going to keep doing it.
Anyway. I don’t know. I’m fine. Whatever. I don’t know. My head is pounding today. Every time I stand up I feel like my brain is going to explode. The sinus thing really kicks my ass in pregnancy. There are all these symptoms you can have, and I don’t have all of them, and that’s good, but yikes the ones I do have are unpleasant. And what the fuck do sinuses have to do with being pregnant? At least I’m not constipated I guess. It’s Friday, and I’m sharing a lot.
Listen, it’s fine. Everything is great. Pregnancy is so temporary. The baby is the size of a “large mango.” Cool.
It’s a girl, by the way. Full set! Super pumped. I also would have been totally happy with two boys because Evan is a perfect thing and why wouldn’t I want another one exactly like him, but this will be a big adventure and I’m nothing if not always looking to complicate the shit out of my life.
Baby Girl is kicking me very much and it is still early enough that it is mega cute and not painful or rib-reaching or anything, and I’m really happy about that. Just kickin’ around in there, living her little tadpole life.
A girl! I really like being a woman and most things associated with it (except for pregnancy and the ABSOLUTE UNFAIRNESS of breastfeeding, but that’s nature and nature is not fair). In my case the things I love about being a woman are super cis, hetero-normative things like hair and dresses and painting nails and walking slowly through the mall touching things while having long conversations about people’s inner lives. I hope she gets to have that too. And frankly, I hope Evan also knows the joys of walking through a J.Crew at 11am on a Saturday and talking about compassion and The Future and how to be a good person and do you think I can pull off espadrilles with the straps that go up your ankle. Because those are good times. And then going and getting a pretzel.
Billy and I have a small fear that new baby will be the absolute opposite of Evan. That she’ll be a very picky eater who doesn’t sleep at night and screams at a very high pitch. But also maybe she will be a super good napper and a normal breastfeeder (as opposed to an every hour on the hour breastfeeder like some of us) and maybe she won’t eat us out of house and home, who knows? Guessing about this stuff is sort of fun but also sort of stressful when you are a control monster.
Speaking of being a control monster, our new house is still majorly under construction and the other day I freaked out and started looking at places to stay for 10 days after we move and haha that would cost us around $2,000. Or more! We are moving on Tuesday and our house won’t really be done until August 14th, when we return from a week-long family vacation. But we don’t leave for the vacation until August 5th, so we have from July 26th through August 5th to basically camp out in our construction zone of a house. We can’t move our furniture in because we are refinishing the floors while we are on vacation. God, all of this is so mind-numbingly boring. I have a lot of respect for contractors for having to keep all this stuff in their heads. The toilet and sink can’t go in until the walls are painted. The walls can’t be painted until the tiles are in. The tiles can’t go in until they are delivered to the warehouse and somebody drives to godforsaken Waltham to pick them up and bring them to the house. And this is only the bathroom! We also have HVAC installation happening and holes in the floors and soffits to build. And every single wall to paint. HAHAHAHAhahahahacries.
But I’m trying to think of it as a fun adventure. We aren’t staying in a hotel, we are staying at our house that we own, and we are going to fill the living room with pillows and blankets and toys and we are going to play in the backyard a lot and it’s all going to be fine. We will read books and order takeout and have lots of picnics and it’s going to be great. Having a panic attack about it before it even happens is good and healthy for no one.
Also, can I just talk to you about little baby girls in sleeveless dresses? Their chubby little armsssssss. Hold on, google image searching that shit…
Thank you, internet:
Blorp. Let’s get one of those.