29 Weeks

by admin

IMG_6916

Pay no attention to the unmade bed, I slept 38 minutes longer than I was planning to and the bed didn’t get made, I’m only human for GOD’S SAKE.

So hi guys! I don’t know, things are fine.

29 weeks pregnant means I have nine weeks to go, because of my aforementioned blood pressure situation. What’s nine weeks? Three weeks, three times. What’s three weeks? Basically nothing. So I have basically no time left. Which is great and also terrible. Haha I literally just remembered, just in this moment right now, that I am planning to finish my novel by the time this baby is born. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Let’s talk about pills. Here are the pills I take every day:

Labetalol (twice a day) – because my blood doesn’t work
Zantac (twice a day) – to keep my stomach acid in my stomach where it belongs, instead of coming out of my mouth or sitting painfully in my ribs/back
Iron – because my last blood test showed that I am slightly anemic
Stool softener (we’re really getting into it now) – because iron makes your poop even harder than pregnancy already makes it, which means your poop is basically a diamond, every time, a huge poop diamond that is not pretty or sparkly at all
Baby Aspirin – because of something about blood pressure, there was a study I guess, I don’t know, my doctor told me to take it so I take it
Prenatal vitamin – obvious
Prenatal vitamin DHA supplement – because apparently DHA helps your baby have a brain, I am a little bit on the fence about this one because I think vitamins are a racket, but I was taking a gummy vitamin before, which is delicious and less nausea-inducing, but doesn’t have iron, and then I was anemic so maybe vitamins are real, I mean,  I guess they are, fine. Well, at least iron is, and at this point, who the fuck am I to be like “DHA is bullshit”? I’m not a scientist, I’ll just do what my doctor says. I GUESS. (It’s this kind of thinking that makes people not vaccinate their children, trust your doctor/science and calm down, me.)

A few times this week I got weirdly dizzy and exhausted and the second time it happened I called my doctor, thinking I was maybe more severely anemic than I thought and she asked me what I ate that day and I told her (cereal with banana, apple, goldfish crackers) and she made me feel bad for both not eating enough and simultaneously eating too many carbs. My blood sugar wasn’t right, I guess, was her thought. But I have a lot to think about. I have to take a million pills a day, I have to try to eat with them or they make me nauseous, I have to try to eat foods with iron (spinach and beef, pretty much, as far as I can tell, which are hard to eat on the go and require cooking or, like, a plate, at least, and I’m busy!) and now I have to also make sure I’m eating foods with lots of protein, distributed evenly throughout the day so I don’t get too hungry and it makes me dizzy and fatigued. It’s just a lot to think about, is all I’m saying.

I remember after giving birth to Evan, once a few weeks passed, I didn’t have to worry as much about eating and it was such a relief. To be responsible for only myself felt like a gift. Of course, that’s not accurate. I’m responsible for a lot of people, still. I’m not, like, the only doctor in a tiny village in a developing country or anything, my problems are not huge, I’m only responsible for myself and a toddler and what will eventually be another baby, but all I’m saying is it will be nice to have the things I put in my mouth only affect me, just my one body.

I have never liked being two people. I just want to be one person.

But you know, things are good still, I’m just complaining because I’m lucky enough to be able to.

What kinds of pills do you take? Tell me in the comments! And we can have a competition for how many pills we take per day and I think I will be the winner unless you have some kind of intense and chronic disease, which I hope you don’t have. Let’s all not get intense, chronic diseases. Because taking pills is annoying. Oh god, this is going off the rails. TELL ME ABOUT YOUR PILLS.